where do i go but here

I feel such need to be so connected,
but damn I feel helpless and so unrelentless

I wish I could fight for your love and affection,
but there's nothing here for you to want or for you to connect with,

I'm sad and alone,
but safe in my home,
a hole in the ground is where I want to go

so please o please tell me
you're offended,
because nothing I see makes me see just how restless
I make you and make you,
please try to understand,
but everything I say makes you feel stuck in quicksand-

there's darkness and faces
so mean and disgusted,
by everything i say and think,
I'm just so helpless,
it's sad to think that I was once not so helpless,
but caught up in thoughts of suicide has made me careless and restless

there's one place i want to go
and that place is home,

the home where i know i belong,
where that is i do not know,
but please point your finger,
so you can be done with me,

because nothing is standing,
except you so close to me...

i love you, i love you,
i miss you all the same,
i don't care what i think,
as long as you're still sane.
there's lower-case letters,
and a cease and desist,
but my heart is aching,
no joy to resist.

im sorry.